The Tenderness of a Toddler

Sometimes I am simply blown away by how tender, gentle, and understanding children can be. Amidst the tantrums and the "BUT I WANT IT, IT'S MINE!" moments are the instances that are forever etched in my heart. I am so grateful for these etchings.

I have been dealing with some wicked side effects from the Cipralex my doctor just put me on. I am also dealing with a sinus & tonsil infection, which I have been put on antibiotics for and may also be throwing some side effects at me. For the past 3 days I have been vomiting, dizzy, weak, and constantly dripping from the nose. Last night was the worst because I couldn't get any long stretches of sleep. It's been rough, I'm not going to pretend to be superwoman. I'm barely managing to stay upright long enough to feed and clothe my child, and everything else is pretty much on the back burner.

Beaner is well aware of how sick I am. She's vomited before, she knows how much it sucks to "have the puke-ies", as she called them. So, when I went running for the bathroom this morning, she was hot on my heels. "Mommy! You puke-ies in the toilet please! I'm here Mommy. It's ok, I got you, you're safe". She patted my head and back, handed me a towel and my water bottle and gave me hugs when I was done. Here is my 2 year old daughter comforting me as I sobbed between heaves, telling me that it was ok and would be over soon.

Maybe I'm not doing such a bad job with her, after all.

Tantrums, Thy Name Be Beaner

Today's post was supposed to be a cd review (Hi Mike!) but I had to put it on hold so I could unload about what a hellacious week I'm having here.

Beaner has decided that this is the week where she's going to be a total wanker to her Dad and I. Every simple request, every established routine, every favorite, is all being rejected, or thrown at us. Our sweet, easy going toddler is nowhere to be found and in her place is this raging beast who is prone to melt down if the cat dares to look in her general direction.

As a first time Mom, I'm flying blind here. Is this a phase? Am I oversensitive because I'm tired and I'm making too much of it? Is she feeding off my crap mood? Am I a horrible mother? Was she switched out with robobitchbaby and we are just noticing now?

So many questions, zero answers.

She had me up all night and was then awake for the day at 5am this morning. Of course, meltdowns are rampant today so she's been put down for an unprecedented early nap. She's currently screaming at me from her crib about the pillow she just threw across the room in anger. I'm sorry kiddo, but maybe you shouldn't have thrown your pillow?

I adore my daughter, and she's generally a joy to be around, but this week, let me tell ya, if I was offered an opportunity to run away and join the circus, you can bet your butt I'd take it.

To quote one of my favorite Simpsons lines; Pray....for....Mojo....

And Then There Was Thunderdome

At some point between the coughing and the fever subsiding, thieves made off with my sweet, easygoing Beaner. Now, I'm left with a short fused, contrary fiend who has an epic meltdown at even the slightest perception of not getting her own way. Of course, with a meltdown comes flailing, and with flailing comes smacking the head on whatever object tends to be in the way. Namely, the floor.

This coincides with us weaning her off television. Not only was I tired of watching Dora and Wiggles for hours on end, but it was getting far too easy to turn the tv on and let her watch while I got some work done, or cleaned the house, or just tried to catch a breather. While her mood might not be caused by the lack of her favorite shows, it sure isn't endearing us to the little drama queen.

It's a rough go of it as she screams for Dora, but it's worth it to break the habit now, instead of battling her on it later. Good thing I have lots of craft ideas and art supplies! I may not be Dora, but there's lots of awesome things in my backpack.

A Flat Forehead Moment

There are some days when the light bulb burns brightly above my head. There are some days when the light bulb is not only dark, I can't remember where I put the damn thing. Today, thankfully, started off with a shining bulb, courtesy of the little bean.

I work from home, as I have for the past 6 years, maintaining client accounts for an oil & gas company. My schedule is completely set by me, aside from having to answer the phone when calls come in, or responding to a client's email. The gift of not putting our bean in daycare or preschool is something I am thankful for every day.

Working from home can present unique roadblocks, however. Trying to remain professional and deal with a client call can be difficult when your child is screeching at the top of her lungs and pulling your shirt off in an effort to get in your lap to slam on your keyboard or take the phone out of your hand so she can call Daddy (let me tell you, that is only cute once, tops).

Today bean decided to teach me how to get work done and keep her happy. Imagine my surprise when she pushed her chair up beside mine, plopped her favorite bear in it, and proceeded to feed him cheerios. She then went one step further and climbed in and starting having a pretend breakfast with him while I dealt with a particularly weird IT issue with my company's website.

My moment of luminary brilliance came when I put her v-tech laptop in front of her and told her she can work beside me while I work. We've been sitting side by side happily for the last hour, working on our respective projects in peace. Me with clients, her with the balloon blast game.

She's just packed her laptop up and informed me that she has to go to work now. Have a good day honey!

Around The House

While thinking of things to do with jelly bean on a cold, wet, Sunday afternoon, I remembered a bag of makeup sponges in various geometric shapes.

Shapes are all the rage in our house these days. "Mommy! That's a circle" "I has triangle!"

I poured a few different bowls of paint, threw down a dropcloth, handed her the sponges and some paper and I let her go to town.

 And to town she went!

At some point, she forgot about the sponges altogether.

For half a bag of dollar store sponges and some paint, I had a very happy toddler and some new art for our walls. I can see us running out of space soon!

Summer Fun

As summer is upon us, I'm left wondering how many more times I can take Jelly Bean to the local wading pools before I try and drown myself out of boredom. She's 22 months and extremely active, curious and intelligent and we both hate being cooped up in the house.

Wading pools and splash parks are great but they are a lot of work to prepare for and clean up after, especially when you rely on public transit to get around.

It is my mission this summer to come up with unique, fun, educational activities and outings for us as a family.

On a semi-related note, we tried camping over the weekend and we were completely rained out. Score 1 for Mother Nature.